Free Time
by Camui Hyde
Summary: This is what happens when Konoha doesn't have missions for months
1. Training Gone Wrong

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, or their clothes, or the stores, or the books, or anything except for the insanity that the characters are about to suffer through…

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Uzumaki Naruto muttered under his breath as he punched a tree, shattering it and causing it to fall on him. Hyuuga Hinata was standing on the other side of the tree, but quickly ran off while Naruto tried to crawl out from under the tree. She couldn't let Naruto know she was watching him.

Naruto struggled under the gigantic tree, losing his oxygen as he tried to push the "stupid log" as he had decided to call it. For some reason he decided that insulting the tree would somehow help him. Naruto, still lying flat under the tree, had began pounding on the tree and trying to bite at it between curse words, to no avail. Hinata giggled from behind another tree and tiptoed over to the bottom of the trunk that held her love down. Naruto, meanwhile, was squirming as he was beginning to lose the last bits of oxygen he had.

"Baka-kun," Hinata whispered under her breath as she placed an exploding seal on the bottom of the tree. She quickly ran off and (A/N at this point I've decided it's gonna be a comedy, not a romantic comedy. Joy.) 3...2...1...BOOM! The tree flew at least 500 feet into the air before disintegrating into ash. Likewise, Naruto's orange jumpsuit had begun to burn up.

Naruto stood up and began to run around like a madman as his clothes disintegrated, only to end up running into another tree and setting it on fire as well. Hinata caught herself drooling as she stared at her love, revealing more and more of his body, unwillingly, every second.

Meanwhile...

Uchiha Sasuke was sitting in the Ichiraku Ramen shop, taking a sample of their newest ramen. "Oh damn I can see why Naruto likes this stuff so much."

"So you gonna pay for that, kid?"

"Put it on Uzumaki Naruto's tab."

"Uzumaki Naruto hasn't paid his tab in five years."

"Well the put it on Hatake Kakashi's tab."

"Or, how 'bout you pay me now? Seriously, what is it with you deadbeat ninjas?"

"Um, I could just kill you, then I wouldn't have to worry about paying you."

"Right, Hatake Kakashi's tab it is then. Actually the meal is free!"

"Damn straight." Sasuke smirked; he had always popped his collar, why not start acting ghetto too?

As the Uchiha stepped outside he saw the billowing clouds of black smoke that Uzumaki Naruto had caused. A small twitch, "f...," and another, "fi...," and another, "FIRE!"

Sasuke quickly ran off into the forest, focusing his chakra into his mouth. "FWEE!"

Meanwhile...again...

Kakashi was off sitting in a tree reading his favorite romance book; somehow porn in words works for him. While he was distracted (A/N Get your minds outta the gutters readers hides copy of Icha Icha Paradise) a small fire was evolving into a grand conflagration. Kakashi flipped another page as the tree burst into flames. Kakashi was so focused on his book; he fell straight down into the flames, only to lose his book to the fire. "...Paradise...Lost..." Kakashi's eyes burned dark red, this was his favorite copy, and he was going to kill whoever had disturbed his passionate reading time.

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Okay so, first chapter is done with. Not too good but it's just to set up the story. The hilarity will definitely be upped in the next chapter.


	2. Steamy

Camui Hyde does not ow--Sasuke: FWEE::blows fire onto the disclaimer:: Me: ...Okay so, since Sasuke has burned away my original you'll have do deal with a really basic disclaimer this chapter. I don't own Naruto or anything related to it

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"Naruto, what're you doing?" said a young Uchiha as he arrived to see his friend naked with his hair on fire.

"AHHH" was Naruto's only response, aside from the shaking and running around that had permanently scarred Sasuke's fragile eyes.

With another twitch, Sasuke had decided to join in the fun and put his hand up to his mouth. "FIRE!" Screamed Sasuke as he started to blow flames onto the ground and everything on it. Naruto's eyes widened as Sasuke began laughing manically and burning little animals and such. Naruto tried to scurry away, but Sasuke had a little torture planned for his buddy, and spewed a ring of fire around him.

(A/N What you are about to read cannot and will not be unread. You have been warned, I MEAN IT.)

But enough about that, what ever happened to Hinata? Well...

(A/N LAST CHANCE! YOUR VERY LAST CHANCE)

Kakashi was speeding along through piles and piles of charred logs and earth when a loud yell hit his ear from the left. He quickly turned his head to face the direction it came from and his eyes widened. What he saw (A/N I decided to be kind, and give you one last chance. The next part of this sentence could scar you for life.) was Hyuuga Hinata in a shallow creek, protected from the embers, and in a position he had only read about in Jiraiya's novels. Kakashi stared in awe as he watched the young girl, finally being able to visualize what Jiraiya used very often. This only served to fuel Kakashi's anger about his book being destroyed, and he quickly returned to his quest to find the "heartless people with no respect for decent literature."

"Sa...Sasuke. What are you doing?" said a cowered Naruto, holding his headband over his private areas.

"FIRE!" Screamed Sasuke as his eyes glew brighter than the fumes he shot out of his mouth. Naruto knew what was coming, and he was scared. He quickly stood up and braved the ring that surrounded him as Sasuke's chakra floated into the ring, turning it into a full circle of flames. Naruto ran as fast as he could, trying to hold his ninja headband up for censorship. Sasuke turned away from Naruto, giving Naruto the idea that Sasuke had given up. As Naruto stopped to breath for a second, Sasuke quickly turned around and spewed fire onto his best friend's hind quarters. Naruto yelped and began to run again, with Sasuke quickly beginning pursuit

"Sasuke! Stop!" Naruto yelled as he ran up into a half burnt tree, losing his grip on the headband that fell down and onto a certain sensei's eyes.

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Alright so there's the second chapt--Sasuke: WHY DID YOU MAKE ME SEE NARUTO NAKED? Me: Uh...Wel--Hinata: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU LET KAKASHI SEE ME DOING THAT Me: Uh oh...Um...bye!!


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